Wednesday, December 31, 2008

New Years Brawl

Here to the new year
another fucking match
continuously punched
in the face with facts
of existence

and to every ones amazement

You stand back up year after year
eye hanging out of socket, purple welted eyes
for another round and every one knows
what a worthless brutal sport it is.

but in some weird masochism they thinks they like it
or at least live in such fear of the other option
do like it.

and every one cheers when you give a right inside jab
to that opponent, or are too fast to get caught by his
sledge hammer fist.
but you know he is too big to take on your self.

but, what fun is a fight if you dont fight.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

The Death of Captian Scaredheart


"How the fuck did this happen?!?!"

"well, uh, im pretty sure, he uh, saw the note about what an asshole,
we all think he is. "

"Yea, and then... well,
his eyes glazed black, and his skin paled white
like a man who just found out
all his life's hardest work is worthless..."

Monday, December 29, 2008

How the Animals disguise there Love

And it is the jealously lusting black dog that gnashes his
loved ones bones in fear that they will discover each other
and leave the bleak black dog alone. when really
the black dog would revive more love by sharing his

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Surcumbed to the bruises of Ego

its seems we see all ourselves as the victim

child like confused anxious

the one on the ground, beaten by what we call life.

but truth seems to say, this is just life, and
revenge is far from reparation
now do work to live it.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

The Appitite of Young hurt men

Always was he in wanting of a girl made of flowers,
for theres was the alluring colour and contours
coupled with perfumed grace.

but though flowers maybe beautiful soon they are to wither with age
and what substance do they offer.

prehaps he should hunt those who bear fruits
instead of flowers

because his appetite is never filled
even after devouring a field

of the wildest flowers

Friday, December 26, 2008

frustration in discipline

Do it come on do it!!

doesnt fuckin matter what it is

this helps the pain leave you alone

so let your neurosises in

and just write even if it be in bad form.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Passing solstace

Alrgiht, we know, at least for a day now.

after this we settle in for a long winter's
alone coldness until life tactfully relives in spring

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

In deaths rebirth

Look, I know dude, i know its all pagan rituals
but the rituals are what to help us to feel less fucked up
in accordance to existence.

its not like i decorate a living tree in the middle of my room
because i worship a magical baby.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

From where we hath came.

Family is that funny little thing.

It's the only place that you love every one so much

that your constantly irate and irrational and sour to them.

Monday, December 22, 2008

When shown in unshrouded form

here now no one speak of the black beast in the room

lets mask and costume and play and repress

no one must know no one will know

mans animalisms inside us all.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

indecreed of existence

Dear life, please know, I know

there are so many ways to see you

and hold you.

yet I cant seem to not turn away from you
and view what life does not give me.

and that forces me to search you.

to make some thing of you .

but you are just here always.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Abstentious Dionysianism (part 2)

The boy would lust of blossoms
and it would manifest in his oral fixation

he remembered when he was young, he would ravishingly eat the blossoms
the colourful burst of life all around him.

now things are grey dripping and murky and his mind still
remembers when he was not alone becuase he had befriended
young women in bloom.

Friday, December 19, 2008

The Embarrassed hang over

curse this wretched head, a vile skull of insecurity

who would think I, a skeleton would have so much terror when confronted with
my own ghosts

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Catch a cold

From young to old, the women although disgusted

can not turn from the boy who is sick

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Personality thievery

just maybe, if i can catch something and use it
to describe my self, then i wont be just an empty vessel
wrapped in linen

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

A death of the detached

"dude, i told you, you wasted all your time complaining,
drinking and lusting, now your face
is old and sad and lonely."

"please, please i repent i will do my work, i will care,
i know i can only accomplish when i
do my work"

"too late you are too die alone in the ice, like the icy glare
and comments you gave to your contemptoraries"

"and what of you blacked angel? you wont love me?"

"i lived as you with caluous becuase my venusious qualities and now am
forced to as this"

"so we are all guilty then"

Monday, December 15, 2008

Too two, who, conceal selfishly

see all I can promise is.. cuity

and that is unconducive for you

and when you veil, i can pretend to love at the
vague reflective pure anything behind it.

and that is unconducive for me

for when it drops and the white anything is gone
and tarnished with flesh and shape and needs

i will feel the need to leave to know new enigma

Sunday, December 14, 2008

pursuite of sophistication

Turning the boy to a gentleman

many horrid and bile dragonious monsters were slayed

facing storms of angry tears and a chest bashed by anxiety

he smiled melancholy sitting upon the symbol of fertility

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Vital organs

When you listen just a little you see how faceless everyone is
and how there guts are spilling out, right there in front of you
on to the street and you think

"why the hell am I the only one seeing this!!"

and then you look down and see your own entrails
trailing behind you
and you get nervous

Friday, December 12, 2008

A Tender Acquisition

Perhaps this purchase is just what i need

need to make him fall back in love with me.

Im sure it could not be the years of emotional work
and time taken to understand one each other.

No, I am quite sure there is always a quick fix solution.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

The pale spirit of Ardore

Some look in there careless eyes upon it

some look in there intumesce glare

how could this happen

how could this man view love as if it was ghostly

gone, withered and opaque

leaving only a nude veiling

for tears to crush upon

would noninternalization ever stike him swiftly

as to reimburse his emotion

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

House Paint on Canvas

There were days, when man could be a man in a man's work.

Iron, whales, coal, steal, naval arms

they didnt have personality or statements

they pierced there ears because they didnt want the demons
inside of them, to drown them at sea.
not because
they wanted to express there individual "tribal" nature

often sitting around in my shitty jewelry and fag clothes

i wish i could just give it up for a wool uniform and a harpoon

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Contemptary relations

"Look ill find the god damn key just give me a fucking second."

"this is always like you... and you know, its freezing out here, I am so

"Yea i know you are and i tried OK? i tried really fucking hard, to give you one
one good fucking feeling, and you just bitch"
"You know how much i fucking wished some one cared enough to give one
fucking minute to me, where my chest wasnt pounding with anxiety and
my god damn hands shaking like a scared child freezing to death?"

"Your really so disgustingly selfish..."

"God, ah fuck i know, I am sorry ok, look I found the stupid key,
can we just go in and pretend i didnt freak out, you know
and have a good night?

That which is ridgid and uncarring

as for as long as time has been

some men know, there are things

that we can show

that we can speak

that will turn men too stone

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Keep warm in thy Cave

alone alone alone in the winters rape
what animals life shall i take
to take its skin and to make
it my own
to feel less alone

Saturday, December 6, 2008

A life in Worth

"There is nothing wrong with good schmaltz, nothing wrong with good heart... The critics think I'm kind of corny. Well, I guess I am corny." - Walt Disney

Dear Mr. Walt Disney
Today would be your birthday, as you of course know.
Your well over a 100, and yet still more prevalent in
our culture then almost any one last century, although
know one really knows what you did, and ignorants call
you a nazi or some other insecure insults because
people cant believe some one wants to be good.

but what I Really want to say is thanks.

Thanks for putting a place in this world that can
make people feel good.

life is fucking frustrating, tied up with trash, sex, work,
anxiety, worthlessness, car wrecks, junk food, poor relationships,
and general depressions

and all you wanted was a place for you, your daughters,
and everyone else to just feel ok, feel good, feel happy.

and in my own fucked up way, thats all i want to do to.

When people laugh at Mickey Mouse, it's because he's so human, and that is the secret of his popularity.
- Walt Disney

Friday, December 5, 2008

The conceptual reality of things

"well, what, damn it, you painted me to look like
a fat cow!, is that how you see me?! a fat cow???"

"well, look mam, I am sorry, you know, we are
just trying our best for a empirical reconstruction"

"We need to see if you can tell the differnce of
reality and your self image"

"god your cruel and heartless,
you may paint me as the beast
but know
know that you are truly the beast
and i need no data to prove that"

Thursday, December 4, 2008

What settles with Time

"ugh, I should have never grown so settled here, your
elegant bird neck no longer plagues my interest, and I
can hardly move to woo you if i even desired too..."

"I have had to hear you snarl and bark for so long,
and I long, long to go out to the forest to love
like we once did... c'est la vie "

"HEY! insult me in english you pretentious bird brain!"

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Intimacy Lost

"Oh dear, we are quite opaque, quite delicate, quite clean,
and lastly quite loved"

"Tis not the same for out brothern"

"There bold faces, ruff hands, tarnished cloth, and quite worked"

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

The Unconscious and the Conscious

He wondered if she could see his two internal projections
placed together in his mind when he sat with her.

and thought

"If she see's my tights my frill
my leanness my pale insecurities
then she shall not be swayed by the vicious colour
of my animas"

Monday, December 1, 2008

Beneath the cloak of Human Perfection

"Come back! come back!!!"
she cried in despondent terror

"The primordial ethos seem to have swept
away my hands veil"

"Now, now they shall tarnish with blood and work
the imperfections to be beheld by all,
and I ashamed for eternity"